Why Women are Leaving the Church
- May 13
- 4 min read
Here is the headline that caught my attention:
Young Women Are Leaving Church in Unprecedented Numbers. Over the last two decades, which witnessed an explosion of religious disaffiliation, it was men more than women who were abandoning their faith commitments.
As a retired pastor, I confess it was the women in my congregations that were the strength and motivation of what went on in Church life. Women were the ones who read the books, took the notes of sermons preached, worked tirelessly in helping the kid’s programs, organizing events … the list goes on and on. Now, what is happening is that younger women are simply disappearing from Church life.
Some of the reasons that have been bantered around, focus on restrictive gender roles, the enforcement of complementarianism, and a lack of female leadership opportunities. In some cases, these issues are more pronounced, making women feel less important as men. The clash between how culture sees women, and the perception of how the Church sees women also contributes to women leaving the Church. Women have become more educated, workforce-centric, and liberal. Particularly in higher education, women have steadily outpaced men for years, and today, nearly 60 percent of Bachelor’s Degrees are awarded to women. What I have learned from those writing about this issue, is these women are not leaving their faith … they are just not satisfied with Church life today.
Here are the two basic views that Churches hold to as they see women in the Church:
Complementarianism. A theological view holding that men and women are created equal in dignity and worth but are designed with distinct, complementary roles in marriage and the Church. Certain roles are right for men and not for women.
Egalitarianism. The ethical and political doctrine asserting that all humans are equal in fundamental worth, social status, and rights, advocating for the reduction of inequalities. Woman can be ordained and serve as a pastor on the Church staff.
When I asked my wife about her roles over 30 years as a Christian Broadcaster, she outlined for me how she was treated at times. When she managed Christian radio stations, she had moments when males in the community questioned her decisions because she was a woman. However, she did have a disclaimer where she did have great relationships with both genders, so equality can be found among the genders. However, read carefully what her testimony may reveal to you:
Ignored often among peers, men always getting more attention.
Opinions not taken seriously. A man would mention the same idea within the same meeting and be praised.
Men and women felt they could freely use disparaging or sarcastic words that would never be spoken to a male.
Sexually hit on by men, sometimes subtle, sometimes blatantly.
Sexual tension over clothing and how she looked. Was extra conscious of how she dressed to avoid inappropriate comments. Hair had to be done well or she would hear a snide comment. Comments even made about her perfume.
Church leaders/pastors ignore women/wives in general. A wife is seen more as a passenger rather than a driver.
Men who are aggressive are leaders, women who are aggressive are considered ‘difficult.’
What I am taking away from all of this is simple. No one should be seen as less then, because God does not see it that way … ever. The Book of Jonah shows us the kind of God we serve. God wanted Jonah to preach to Ninevah, a hated people of the Hebrew people. Even though the people of Ninevah were murderers, thieves, and godless, God still considered them worthy to be told the truth. Women have played an incredible role in the story of God revealed in the Scriptures … the New Covenant has enlisted them equal to men in bringing the Good News of the Gospel to lost people. Some say women can do anything … but teach men and be Elders. Fine, the local Church can set the rules of their congregation, but the Body of Christ is larger than the local Church, and women are seen in all kinds of leadership capacities in ministries around the world. How can this be, if they were not called and equipped to serve? The Body of Christ is who we are … full of different cultures, different languages, and different ministries, not one is all inclusively sovereign. In other words, we need each other, that is how a body works.
1 Corinthians 12:21 The eye cannot say to the hand, “I have no need of you.”
Here is my simple theology. We need women in the Church to balance out how men act and think … period. You think this is a joke? Ask any married man how this works.
Challenging the Culture with Truth … Larry Kutzler